“I don’t have to be your best friend, I’m your Mother"

What I said to Owen the other night after our fight at the dinner table. My perfect little pumpkin was acting out of sorts, fighting me over everything, followed by screaming and “you’re not my best friend mommy”.  “I don’t have to be your best friend, I’m your mother” I replied.

As soon as those words left my mouth, I immediately thought of my parents, something they said to me many of times while growing up. Almost at my wits end I brought Owen upstairs, gave him a bath, and put him in his room for some quiet time. He assured me that he wasn’t going to bed, and I assured him that he did not have to, but that he would be taking some time to himself, in his room.

Twenty minutes later, I went upstairs to check on Owen. “Hi Mom, I’m reading books!” almost as though this fight downstairs had never happened. All was good in the world, and I was now again his “best friend”.

As Owen is growing and learning, so am I. I don’t have all the answers, but I try to do the best that I can. As a parent, you have so much to worry about. All of a sudden you have this precious gift, this gift relies on you, and this gift looks up to you, you want to do the what’s best for your child, and it’s hard to know what that is at all times. The icing on the cake here is that he is only three years old! I have so many years to worry about! I get anxious thinking of public school, highschool, then I just have to STOP and not get too far ahead of myself, all of this worrying will not do me any good.

So here is my advice to you parents out there- stop worrying! That sounds almost impossible, but we worry because we love our children. What you can do is, do the best that you can, always have their best interest even if that leaves them in their room for quiet time. Model the behavior that you want to see in them. Stay consistent, stand your ground, keep them safe. And lastly, you may have good days, you may have bad days, but no matter what, always love them.