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Time to get up, the Son is shinning

You know that feeling… The feeling you get when someone is staring at you while you sleep? I get that feeling almost every morning.  It doesn’t startle me but I am very aware of it. I open my eyes and there is Owen quietly staring with his blankie and a bear in hand. “Hi Mom!” he says. “Hi Owen.  Good morning”, I say. Then I look at my phone to see what time it is, and it’s 5am… Oh my it’s 5 am. “Time to get up!” says Owen.  Owen, my love it is only 5am, would you like to crawl into bed with me? Let’s sleep a little longer.”  Owen assures me it’s morning and tells me that the sun is out. “Look the sun is shining through your curtains” I peek behind the curtains… Honey, that is the street lamp, it’s 5am. I look over at Owen and he has a big smile across his face. He could care less that it is 5am; he doesn’t know what 5am means.  All he knows is that he’s up and he’s happy and he’s ready to play.  “Ok, I’ll get up”, I wink back. 

We go downstairs.   I make myself a coffee and get Owen some milk.  I get down on the floor beside him as he plays with his toys and try to look as enthusiastic as he does while he tells me about robots and what they can do to buildings. We play a little longer, and then I make breakfast.  Then we build a fort in the living room, play with trains, and then it is just about time for us to get ready for school. I look at the clock and tell Owen that I will let him watch a show on TV while I run upstairs to get myself ready. I scoot upstairs to do my hair, make-up and throw on some clothes. I then head downstairs to get Owen dressed and ready for school, and what do I find?  He is fast asleep on the couch.  I smile, and let him sleep a little longer before getting him ready for school. 

Slowly, I wake Owen.  Eyes blinking open, he greets me with, “Hi Mom”.  “Hi Owen,” I smile back. “Time to get up, the sun is shining”

This post was written awhile back but I thought it might be useful to the new mamas out there. Make sure you take time for yourself to refresh and regroup, it is good for you and baby. Xo

Give yourself a break—even if it’s only for an hour or two, it will help you refocus and regroup!

When my son was a month old, I decided to take the afternoon to go shopping! My belly was pretty much back to where it was before the big event (thank you Mom for the great genes) and I was feeling the need to look as cute as my little guy when people came to visit.

For the first hour I walked around the mall aimlessly looking into different stores.  Instead of revelling in the freedom of walking without any responsibilities for a baby, diaper bag or stroller or the fun of trying on the fashion I had missed for nine months, all I could think of was my son. I rushed home, ran in the door, didn’t say “hi” to anyone, picked up my son and just held him, and cried. I couldn’t bear to be without him!

This did eventually pass….. Months would go by and I would peal myself away from him for a couple of hours to do something for myself. When my son got to be about 18 months of age,  this is where the “me times” started to happen--first once a month, then twice a month, then once every two weeks J. Even if it was just myself, a cart, and the grocery store, that one hour I spent doing something for myself, by myself, was time away that I needed .  My son is now 3 years of age and less dependent on me (and maybe I am less dependent on him, as well)  and I find that I need that “me” time less and less.

I know that might sound backwards, but from when my son was a newborn to about two years of age, I was constantly holding him. Constantly. I couldn’t bear to pass up on his upstretched arms and the “Hold you” he would offer me. Don’t get me wrong there were times it drove me CRAZY, especially when I had to vacuum or clean around the house. But I was first and foremost his Mother, and he needed me. Now that he is 3 yrs old, he is less dependent on me and less likely to offer me a “Hold you”.  I still crave being around my son but remind myself to take time for me.  After all, my son is learning to make time for himself, too.

So go clear your heads Momma’s! Catch up with friends and family! Do whatever makes you happy! Even taking an hour to go to the gym! Gym… Hmmm… Now that sounds like a good idea! I’m off! Happy Monday!:)

http://www.suzannetoth.com is now live!!!! Be sure to come back Monday as I will be doing a GIVEAWAY as part of the launch! :)

Happy weekend!

Let's start solids!

Introducing your baby to solids begins around 6 months of age. Start with baby rice cereal that you can purchase at the grocery store and mix it with breast milk, formula or boiled water, the amount of liquid to add will be listed on the box. The first time you introduce your little one to solids whether it be with cereal, veggies or fruit, always start off with only a few tablespoons, then gradually increase the amount you give your baby. This is also important in case your baby has a reaction or allergy to a new food.

For fruit puree- peel and chop fruit, add a little water, and lightly boil until fruit is tender. Once tender place fruit in a blender and blend until smooth.

For vegetables- steam veggies until tender. Drain (optional) then blend. You can also add breast milk or formula to the veggies before blending.

Owens Favourites when he was a baby

Apple

Peach

Blueberry

Avocado 

Avocado and Apple

Banana and rice cereal 

Carrot

Sweet potato

Zucchini and apple

Broccoli

Healthy Eating During Pregnancy

During pregnancy, this time if your life is especially important to make healthy choices when it comes to the food that you eat. Choose a variety of foods that are rich in vitamin C and Vitamin B6. Choose foods high in iron, calcium, folic acid, protein and the "good" fats such as nuts or avocado! Choose foods that are high in fiber and drink plenty of water! Also, Ginger had been known to protect from infection, aid in healing and digestion, and helps clear your body of toxins. Ginger has also been known to settle your stomach from nausea.

Foods That Contain the Vitamins Above:

Vitamin C

Green and Red pepper

Broccoli

Brussels sprouts

Squash

Sweet Potatoes

Oranges

Kiwis 

Vitamin B6

Bananas

Fresh Veggies

Beans (limas, pintos, and chickpeas)

Nuts (Cashews, coconut meat)

Cereals 

Iron

Dark leafy veggies such as spinach or kale

Brewers yeast

Prunes

Raisins

Nuts (Cashews, hazelnuts, peanuts, almonds)

tofu

squash

liver

Calcium

Dairy

Leafy greens

whole grains

carrot juice

tofu

nuts

Folic Acid 

Brocoli

Spinach

Dark green leafy vegetables

Dried Beans

Asparagus

Sunflower seeds

Oranges

Whole grains

Protein

Lean meats

poultry

fish

eggs

soy

milk products

nuts

Good Fats

Nuts

Seeds

Olive oil

Avocado

Fiber 

Whole grains

Prunes

Pear

Mango

Beans

Almonds

Flax seeds

Stronger Than You Know

I’ve had quite an overwhelming response to my “Hello Beautiful” post and a few emails struck home with me. These were individuals who admire the relationship I have with Sean and are hopeful that they will become this amicable with their ex in the future. Today, my relationship with Sean could not be better, but there was a time where this was not the case.  A better relationship with your ex is not always possible or easy but sometimes, with time and patience, you can get there.  Here are some things I have learned through this process.

Stay focused on your children

Put the love for your children above any dislike you may have for your ex partner

Just because your ex wasn’t a great partner for you, it doesn’t mean that they can’t be a great parent to your child

Avoid speaking negatively of your ex in front of, or to, your children

Try not to argue or fight with your ex in front of your children

Communicate with your ex partner--this means listening, too. If the hurt is too fresh, write out everything that makes you upset or angry, or what needs to change, and then revisit this list. You may find some things you’ve written are written out of spite and anger.

If you are having a hard time with the change that has come with the separation, here is some advice that helped me.

 Don’t focus on anything but how you are feeling TODAY.  Ask yourself, “Am I feeling a little better today? Do I feel better than I did yesterday?” If so, hold onto that. Tomorrow will come, and then ask yourself again, “Do I feel better than I did yesterday?”  It is true when they say that “time heals all”. Take time.

Always know that you are stronger than you think you are, trust in yourself.  Ask for help, hope, believe and know you will get through this.  

For those of you who have been on this journey with me, I'm happy to announce that I am a Lamaze Certified Childbirth Educator!! :)

I have appreciated all the love and encouragement along the way. I could not be more excited to start my new career and I will be working away at my new website Suzannetoth.com

Lots of love to you all,

Suzanne.

NYC

From the people, food, sights and sounds I found myself tearing up a few times over how happy I was to be back in the city that never sleeps. I met wonderful people, most born and raised in NYC.  The kindness they showed me was humbling. It reminded me of my first visit to NYC—everyone was so welcoming and warm, I felt almost as though I was at a home away from home. I indulged in pizza by the slice and snacked around Time’s Square.  The Breakfast Sandwich Platter at « The Butchers Daughter » was a warm welcome my first morning there and reminded me a lot of a place I would find in Toronto.  Sarabeth’s was very much my taste—dressy, sophisticated and served a delicious Eggs Benedict.   Both brunches were delightful but I cannot stop thinking about HOW GOOD the tomato jam was at The Butchers Daughter—delicious!

Walking through Central Park was a highlight for me. It was free, it was beautiful, and I had awhile to just sit and watch everything and everyone around me. There were those who were playing music, others were sitting in silent meditation or walking, or jogging, or biking.  Couples, singles, children, families—all going somewhere and all seeming to enjoy the journey.    There is something magical about this place.

I walked through different areas, up and down streets, popping into cafes to grab a hot drink and warm up before continuing on. I looked out from the top of the Empire State building, witnessed an engagement an arm’s length away, walked through the crowds of time square, and met up for dinner and drinks at the W one night with a cousin. The weekend flew by but I can say I made the best out of every moment. 

As I hopped into a cab on my way to the airport,  the feeling was bittersweet. I was leaving the city I had fallen in love with years ago, but I was now a woman and mother—not the young girl who had first been awed by New York.  I was going home to the little boy who holds my heart and the man that I am falling more in love with every day.

Thank you NYC for a time to remember <B

Up until now, every time I baked chocolate chip cookies I stuck to the recipe that my Mom, Nana and Great-Grandmother always used.  They didn’t have the internet link of http://www.hersheycanada.com/recipes/en/recipe-details.aspx?id=6400&name=ORIGINAL-CHIPITS-COOKIESto give them the recipe for this favorite treat; the plastic bag of chocolate chips, with the recipe on the back was all they needed.  I haven't been excited about Gluten Free baking but after Owen's Grandmother sent home her gluten free chocolate chip cookies I was delightfully surpried how great that they tasted! Immediately, I asked her for the recipe and followed the link of http://www.cloud9specialtybakery.com/pdf/C9%20Chocolate%20Chip%20Cookie%20Recipe.pdf  to a new favourite!   I used the Cloud 9 baking mix that she sent home. Simple to use but watch that you wait long enough for the wet ingredients to cool.  Otherwise, your cookies will look more like chocolate swirls!
I hope you enjoy them as much as we do!

Our Own Modern Family

I had planned on saying a little speech yesterday at Owen's Birthday party,  a "Thank you" to everyone for coming to Owen's party, but the day was so busy that I didn't have the chance to. I was running around with the little ones and in between bowling, pizza, cake and arcade games, a quiet moment to make a speech did not arise. It was funny, when Owen's grandmother came up to ask me how many kids there were, I said "15" and started laughing because there were only about 7 but it felt like there were at least 15!! Lol. Nonetheless, it was a great party, Owen had a fantastic time, and so did his little buddies!

What I wanted to say to everyone that came was: How nice it was that we could all be there to celebrate Owen’s Birthday, and how lucky I felt for Owen that he had not only his Mom, Dad and little friends,  he had my side of the family, his Father’s side of the family, and now my boyfriend, Rick’s family—all there to celebrate OWEN. There have been many times when people have commented that « Sean and I are so lucky that we get along so well » .  I didn’t realize how fortunate we were until I heard this sentence over and over again and I am grateful that this is so.  Thank you for making this an easy transition for Owen, thank you for loving him the way that you do, thank you all for being open to new a way of being family, our own little Modern Family. 

My thanks goes out to you for the time you took to be a part of Owen’s 5th birthday, the warm wishes, thoughtful gifts and love you have shared with us means so much!  

Riding the Wave

My « little guy » will be turning five this coming Saturday.  I can hardly believe it!  As the day has come closer, I have been thinking a lot about this journey of Motherhood and I’ve realized that I know very little, to nothing about it—there is so much more to learn. 

Up to the age of three,  Owen was the easiest baby and toddler. Always smiling, never giving me any grief.   I was naïve to think I had this whole « mother thing" figured out. I thought, « I was a natural », « I was a pro at this », « I probably deserve a mother-of-the-year award » ( laughing) and then fast forward to three and one half  and I felt my mother medals slowly leaving me. Owen did not seem to appreciate anything his father and I did for him. It  wore me out!  Even though I prayed that this was just a phase,  it has honestly lasted until about a month ago. Almost a year and a half of it!   

I can laugh about this now because things have definitely improved. Owen is even enjoying school and the phrase « Owen, 5 minutes ’til we get ready for school!»  is now something I do not dread to say. There are more smiles than tears (from both of us) and this fall has been really, very wonderful :) 

Between all of the terrible, pulling-out-hair times of the past five years, there were many times where I would laugh at Owen.  When he wants to be, he is the silliest, funniest little boy—which may save him at times when I’d like to send him to a time out. He is kind to other children, loves to dance and sing and is as smart as a whip! And when he sleeps, when his eyes are closed and he is peaceful, I still see that baby face. 

Someone said something to me yesterday about their daughter that has stuck with me.  They said: «  They don’t listen and they don’t stop growing so enjoy every last minute…It’s all I can do every day... to take her all in and enjoy her." 

As I continue on this journey of Motherhood, thats all I can do. I won’t know what the right thing to do is all the time.  I have to accept his good days with his bad, as he does with mine. Stay present and enjoy every last minute of him, because taking the good days with the bad, we will never have THESE days back again. 

I have so much more to learn, to teach, but this journey has held, by far, the best days of my life. 

Sometimes you just need to throw your hands up and do a jig!

A jig and a bum shake is what I had to do get a smile and a chuckle from Owen. I might have also done this for myself; I needed a smile and a chuckle, about then. It was either that or start pulling my hair out—something my Dad says I drove him to—and which I completely believe as I was no angel!  

Anyway, the other night, Owen was giving me a hard time.  He had played a few games on the IPAD but he didn’t want to get ready for bed. I brought him up to the washroom to brush his teeth and stood him in front of the toilet, he stared at me like it was some sort of cowboy standoff and he had a weapon. He stood there and told me he wasn't peeing and that he wasn't happy with me. So I started to do a jig.  « Thats not funny, Mom, " said Owen. So I shook my butt.  That got a chuckle but no results in the toilet.   Standing there with a smile, Owen said, « I’m still not peeing Mom. «  So then I turned on the tap.  End of choice :)  

It’s a steep climb but I’m learning not to take things too seriously and let small things (which seem like HUGE things when you’re also a tired Mom and all you want to do is go to bed) roll off your back. Its either that or go bald.   I choose this :)

When life throws you a million curve balls, it’s hard not to feel depleted. Nothing happens overnight and my goal of becoming a Childbirth Educator has taken more time

then I ever expected. That being said, when you really want something, you keep on persevering until you get there. You don’t ever stop believing in yourself

or your dreams.  You trust you’ll get there.  You remind yourself that Rome was not built in a day.  Cock-eyed optimist?  Well, if that’s what I have to tell myself until I make it, then that’s what I’ll tell myself!

In the meantime, set yourself up to have the greatest success and surround yourself with positive people. I know this has always been the greatest help for me, having such a great support system really does help!

Besides my little hiccup in the road, I have been enjoying LIFE! Summer weather seems to be here to stay and Owen and I have been enjoying every minute! As soon as the sun comes out we just want to get outside, wander the markets, eat fresh food— and lots of it! And we are not alone—we are meeting new people, and making new friends! 

Below are a some photos of what we've been up to, the places we've been and the people we've seen! 

Wishing you well. x0x0x

           

                                                        ^^^ Dinner together ^^^

                                      ^^^Enjoying my evening with the beautiful women behind Social Common at their Summer Kick Off Party!! ^^^  http://socialcommon.ca                                

                                           

                                                 ^^^FURASOS --Simply delightful! I cannot stop raving about their pappardelle! ^^^ http://www.fusaros.com/#about

                                         ^^^DBAR at FOUR SEASONS--White Truffled sausage,with pommel puree and pork jus. New favourite way to eat sausage, it was fantastic!! ^^^ http://www.dbartoronto.com

^^^Sweet little Owen hanging out at Londons International Food Festival! Our favourite

was the Goodah Gastro Truck.^^^

Scrubs in the City--Soiree Under the Stars for SickKids

From the venue, to the food, to the entertainment,  and the attendees, everything was perfect, my boyfriend and I  were so lucky to be a part of this event, thanks to Social Common.

Through Scrubs in the City, SickKids raised more than $450,000 in support of the SickKids Operating Suites Redevelopment Project.

SickKids performs more than 12,000 surgeries annually to some of the most critically ill children from around the world and we were delighted to be a part of this. 

Below are a few photos from the evening.

http://socialcommon.ca

http://www.sickkidsfoundation.com

The Fluffiest of Pancakes!

I try to make pancakes at least once a week. Owen loves them and I love anything carb-related.

This particular morning, Owen requested that the pancakes not be made with coconut oil or whole wheat, so I searched for "fluffy pancakes" on Google, and chose the picture I thought looked the most appealing. This photo took me to a blog you can find here http://bloggingmama.com/fluffy-homemade-pancakes-from-scratch/ which led me to the fluffy pancake recipe. Owen agreed that these were the BEST pancakes that I have ever made!  

If you decide to try the recipe, just top the pancakes with fruit, powdered sugar and a little syrup, and you've got yourself a real morning treat! :)

Hope you enjoy them as much as we did!

I often go to Toronto to visit my boyfriend and girlfriends alone, as regularly, Owen will spend the weekend with his father. This weekend, I was able to bring Owen with me to Toronto which made my weekend even more special. We had a great time!  This beautiful city has so much to offer—not only for adults but also, for little ones!

Friday, Owen had fun gaming at Playdium, an arcade-style fun place for kids in Missassauga. Saturday, we spent the day in The Beaches and visited my friend’s cafe,  the Mad Hus Café ( https://www.facebook.com/madhuscafe) It was so nice to catch up with friends over espresso, hot chocolate and banana bread! In the evening, we went to dinner theatre at Medieval Times.  There, Owen had the opportunity to cheer on the knights, eat with his fingers and meet the performers after the show. Sunday, we took a walk and had lunch at Hunters Landing.  The burgers, and Owen’s pizza, were delicious and a perfect way to end our weekend.

The previous weekend I was childless and my boyfriend and I had the chance to have a date night at BENT (http://www.bentrestaurant.com/#!home) My favourite part of the meal was the yellow tail hamachi finished along with the caviar and lobster vodka shooters. If you haven’t had the chance to go, I would highly recommend this place for a couple’s or girl’s night out!

Enjoy your week!  X0

TBT

Time to get up, the son is shining 


You know that feeling… The feeling you get when someone is staring at you while you sleep? I get that feeling almost every morning.  It doesn’t startle me but I am very aware of it. I open my eyes and there is Owen quietly staring with his blankie and a bear in hand. “Hi Mom!” he says. “Hi Owen.  Good morning”, I say. Then I look at my phone to see what time it is, and it’s 5am… Oh my it’s 5 am. “Time to get up!” says Owen.  Owen, my love it is only 5am, would you like to crawl into bed with me? Let’s sleep a little longer.”  Owen assures me it’s morning and tells me that the sun is out. “Look the sun is shining through your curtains” I peek behind the curtains… Honey, that is the street lamp, it’s 5am. I look over at Owen and he has a big smile across his face. He could care less that it is 5am; he doesn’t know what 5am means.  All he knows is that he’s up and he’s happy and he’s ready to play.  “Ok, I’ll get up”, I wink back.

We go downstairs.   I make myself a coffee and get Owen some milk.  I get down on the floor beside him as he plays with his toys and try to look as enthusiastic as he does while he tells me about robots and what they can do to buildings. We play a little longer, and then I make breakfast.  Then we build a fort in the living room, play with trains, and then it is just about time for us to get ready for school. I look at the clock and tell Owen that I will let him watch a show on TV while I run upstairs to get myself ready. I scoot upstairs to do my hair, make-up and throw on some clothes. I then head downstairs to get Owen dressed and ready for school, and what do I find?  He is fast asleep on the couch.  I smile, and let him sleep a little longer before getting him ready for school.

Slowly, I wake Owen.  Eyes blinking open, he greets me with, “Hi Mom”.  “Hi Owen,” I smile back. “Time to get up, the sun is shining”

Throw back Thursday-- One of my favourite posts

Days to Remember...

Owen was just about two when Sean and I went our separate ways. I was working at Language Instruction for Newcomers to Canada and made the decision to go back to school. That September, when school started for the both of us, it was the worst September of my life.

Every day was a struggle. Owen had a very hard time adjusting and so did I. Bracing for a good-bye, he would have his arms stretched up to me, crying.  Tears streaming down his face,  I would kiss him, hug him, and tell him I would be back as soon as Mommy was finished class.

As brave as all that was, I would leave home every morning in tears, having to fix my make up in the car before heading to class. I don’t know how I made it through that first year. It must have been the people around me, supporting me, and pushing me forward. I reminded myself that I was going back to school for the better good of myself and my son. I carried on.

A year has passed but Owen still has a tough time in the morning when I drop him off at daycare-- not all days are bad, but still, about 40% of the time it will be a challenge getting him out the door.  We may leave with a few tears, but he is always happy when I pick him up at the end of the day. I keep that in mind.

Yesterday was different, yesterday was a day I always want to remember. As I was getting Owen out of the car Owen shouted “Vanessa is going to be here!” “ Oh how nice! I said back to him. “Yesterday you two were playing ‘tag’ in the school yard, looked like you two were having a great time!” I said. “Yup!”, he said.  Then we walked inside. I took off his coat, hat, and mitts, and gave him a hug and kiss good bye. I could see Vanessa sitting at the table having her morning snack so I said good morning to her, too, and pointed Owen in her direction. Owen waved good bye to me and stood in front of the door with his blankie, like he always does. I stood there for awhile and I am so happy that I did.

 I watched Vanessa as she got up from her chair with her cereal bowl and she walked towards the kitchen to hand her bowl to the teacher. Then she came back towards Owen, bent her knees so that he would look into her eyes, and she smiled. Without saying a word she put out her hand to take his and they walked hand in hand towards the play area.

Tears filling into my eyes “that was so nice” I said out loud. I started walking towards the exit, waving goodbye to other teachers on my way out. And as I drove home, I thought about Vanessa and what a little angel she was. I thought back to this past fall when I would drop off Owen and he would cry, Vanessa would come up and give Owen a hug and I would hear the teacher say “give Owen some space” as I was leaving. Every single day this darling little Vanessa has been the first to come over to Owen and give him a hug, or wait patiently in front of him, standing still, until he is calm, and ready to play.

When I arrived back at daycare to pick up my little Owen, Owen ran up to me yelling ”Momm!!” I gave Owen a hug and a kiss, then I walked over to Vanessa and gave her a hug. What I wanted to say right there was “Thank you for looking after my son. You have no idea what it means to me to know that he has you to comfort him.” But instead, I said “Thank you for being such a great friend to Owen.” No words were returned, but a big smile on Vanessa’s face. That was all that I needed. I smiled back. J