Riding the Wave

My « little guy » will be turning five this coming Saturday.  I can hardly believe it!  As the day has come closer, I have been thinking a lot about this journey of Motherhood and I’ve realized that I know very little, to nothing about it—there is so much more to learn. 

Up to the age of three,  Owen was the easiest baby and toddler. Always smiling, never giving me any grief.   I was naïve to think I had this whole « mother thing" figured out. I thought, « I was a natural », « I was a pro at this », « I probably deserve a mother-of-the-year award » ( laughing) and then fast forward to three and one half  and I felt my mother medals slowly leaving me. Owen did not seem to appreciate anything his father and I did for him. It  wore me out!  Even though I prayed that this was just a phase,  it has honestly lasted until about a month ago. Almost a year and a half of it!   

I can laugh about this now because things have definitely improved. Owen is even enjoying school and the phrase « Owen, 5 minutes ’til we get ready for school!»  is now something I do not dread to say. There are more smiles than tears (from both of us) and this fall has been really, very wonderful :) 

Between all of the terrible, pulling-out-hair times of the past five years, there were many times where I would laugh at Owen.  When he wants to be, he is the silliest, funniest little boy—which may save him at times when I’d like to send him to a time out. He is kind to other children, loves to dance and sing and is as smart as a whip! And when he sleeps, when his eyes are closed and he is peaceful, I still see that baby face. 

Someone said something to me yesterday about their daughter that has stuck with me.  They said: «  They don’t listen and they don’t stop growing so enjoy every last minute…It’s all I can do every day... to take her all in and enjoy her." 

As I continue on this journey of Motherhood, thats all I can do. I won’t know what the right thing to do is all the time.  I have to accept his good days with his bad, as he does with mine. Stay present and enjoy every last minute of him, because taking the good days with the bad, we will never have THESE days back again. 

I have so much more to learn, to teach, but this journey has held, by far, the best days of my life.