NYC

From the people, food, sights and sounds I found myself tearing up a few times over how happy I was to be back in the city that never sleeps. I met wonderful people, most born and raised in NYC.  The kindness they showed me was humbling. It reminded me of my first visit to NYC—everyone was so welcoming and warm, I felt almost as though I was at a home away from home. I indulged in pizza by the slice and snacked around Time’s Square.  The Breakfast Sandwich Platter at « The Butchers Daughter » was a warm welcome my first morning there and reminded me a lot of a place I would find in Toronto.  Sarabeth’s was very much my taste—dressy, sophisticated and served a delicious Eggs Benedict.   Both brunches were delightful but I cannot stop thinking about HOW GOOD the tomato jam was at The Butchers Daughter—delicious!

Walking through Central Park was a highlight for me. It was free, it was beautiful, and I had awhile to just sit and watch everything and everyone around me. There were those who were playing music, others were sitting in silent meditation or walking, or jogging, or biking.  Couples, singles, children, families—all going somewhere and all seeming to enjoy the journey.    There is something magical about this place.

I walked through different areas, up and down streets, popping into cafes to grab a hot drink and warm up before continuing on. I looked out from the top of the Empire State building, witnessed an engagement an arm’s length away, walked through the crowds of time square, and met up for dinner and drinks at the W one night with a cousin. The weekend flew by but I can say I made the best out of every moment. 

As I hopped into a cab on my way to the airport,  the feeling was bittersweet. I was leaving the city I had fallen in love with years ago, but I was now a woman and mother—not the young girl who had first been awed by New York.  I was going home to the little boy who holds my heart and the man that I am falling more in love with every day.

Thank you NYC for a time to remember <B

Our Own Modern Family

I had planned on saying a little speech yesterday at Owen's Birthday party,  a "Thank you" to everyone for coming to Owen's party, but the day was so busy that I didn't have the chance to. I was running around with the little ones and in between bowling, pizza, cake and arcade games, a quiet moment to make a speech did not arise. It was funny, when Owen's grandmother came up to ask me how many kids there were, I said "15" and started laughing because there were only about 7 but it felt like there were at least 15!! Lol. Nonetheless, it was a great party, Owen had a fantastic time, and so did his little buddies!

What I wanted to say to everyone that came was: How nice it was that we could all be there to celebrate Owen’s Birthday, and how lucky I felt for Owen that he had not only his Mom, Dad and little friends,  he had my side of the family, his Father’s side of the family, and now my boyfriend, Rick’s family—all there to celebrate OWEN. There have been many times when people have commented that « Sean and I are so lucky that we get along so well » .  I didn’t realize how fortunate we were until I heard this sentence over and over again and I am grateful that this is so.  Thank you for making this an easy transition for Owen, thank you for loving him the way that you do, thank you all for being open to new a way of being family, our own little Modern Family. 

My thanks goes out to you for the time you took to be a part of Owen’s 5th birthday, the warm wishes, thoughtful gifts and love you have shared with us means so much!  

Riding the Wave

My « little guy » will be turning five this coming Saturday.  I can hardly believe it!  As the day has come closer, I have been thinking a lot about this journey of Motherhood and I’ve realized that I know very little, to nothing about it—there is so much more to learn. 

Up to the age of three,  Owen was the easiest baby and toddler. Always smiling, never giving me any grief.   I was naïve to think I had this whole « mother thing" figured out. I thought, « I was a natural », « I was a pro at this », « I probably deserve a mother-of-the-year award » ( laughing) and then fast forward to three and one half  and I felt my mother medals slowly leaving me. Owen did not seem to appreciate anything his father and I did for him. It  wore me out!  Even though I prayed that this was just a phase,  it has honestly lasted until about a month ago. Almost a year and a half of it!   

I can laugh about this now because things have definitely improved. Owen is even enjoying school and the phrase « Owen, 5 minutes ’til we get ready for school!»  is now something I do not dread to say. There are more smiles than tears (from both of us) and this fall has been really, very wonderful :) 

Between all of the terrible, pulling-out-hair times of the past five years, there were many times where I would laugh at Owen.  When he wants to be, he is the silliest, funniest little boy—which may save him at times when I’d like to send him to a time out. He is kind to other children, loves to dance and sing and is as smart as a whip! And when he sleeps, when his eyes are closed and he is peaceful, I still see that baby face. 

Someone said something to me yesterday about their daughter that has stuck with me.  They said: «  They don’t listen and they don’t stop growing so enjoy every last minute…It’s all I can do every day... to take her all in and enjoy her." 

As I continue on this journey of Motherhood, thats all I can do. I won’t know what the right thing to do is all the time.  I have to accept his good days with his bad, as he does with mine. Stay present and enjoy every last minute of him, because taking the good days with the bad, we will never have THESE days back again. 

I have so much more to learn, to teach, but this journey has held, by far, the best days of my life. 

Sometimes you just need to throw your hands up and do a jig!

A jig and a bum shake is what I had to do get a smile and a chuckle from Owen. I might have also done this for myself; I needed a smile and a chuckle, about then. It was either that or start pulling my hair out—something my Dad says I drove him to—and which I completely believe as I was no angel!  

Anyway, the other night, Owen was giving me a hard time.  He had played a few games on the IPAD but he didn’t want to get ready for bed. I brought him up to the washroom to brush his teeth and stood him in front of the toilet, he stared at me like it was some sort of cowboy standoff and he had a weapon. He stood there and told me he wasn't peeing and that he wasn't happy with me. So I started to do a jig.  « Thats not funny, Mom, " said Owen. So I shook my butt.  That got a chuckle but no results in the toilet.   Standing there with a smile, Owen said, « I’m still not peeing Mom. «  So then I turned on the tap.  End of choice :)  

It’s a steep climb but I’m learning not to take things too seriously and let small things (which seem like HUGE things when you’re also a tired Mom and all you want to do is go to bed) roll off your back. Its either that or go bald.   I choose this :)

When life throws you a million curve balls, it’s hard not to feel depleted. Nothing happens overnight and my goal of becoming a Childbirth Educator has taken more time

then I ever expected. That being said, when you really want something, you keep on persevering until you get there. You don’t ever stop believing in yourself

or your dreams.  You trust you’ll get there.  You remind yourself that Rome was not built in a day.  Cock-eyed optimist?  Well, if that’s what I have to tell myself until I make it, then that’s what I’ll tell myself!

In the meantime, set yourself up to have the greatest success and surround yourself with positive people. I know this has always been the greatest help for me, having such a great support system really does help!

Besides my little hiccup in the road, I have been enjoying LIFE! Summer weather seems to be here to stay and Owen and I have been enjoying every minute! As soon as the sun comes out we just want to get outside, wander the markets, eat fresh food— and lots of it! And we are not alone—we are meeting new people, and making new friends! 

Below are a some photos of what we've been up to, the places we've been and the people we've seen! 

Wishing you well. x0x0x

           

                                                        ^^^ Dinner together ^^^

                                      ^^^Enjoying my evening with the beautiful women behind Social Common at their Summer Kick Off Party!! ^^^  http://socialcommon.ca                                

                                           

                                                 ^^^FURASOS --Simply delightful! I cannot stop raving about their pappardelle! ^^^ http://www.fusaros.com/#about

                                         ^^^DBAR at FOUR SEASONS--White Truffled sausage,with pommel puree and pork jus. New favourite way to eat sausage, it was fantastic!! ^^^ http://www.dbartoronto.com

^^^Sweet little Owen hanging out at Londons International Food Festival! Our favourite

was the Goodah Gastro Truck.^^^

Scrubs in the City--Soiree Under the Stars for SickKids

From the venue, to the food, to the entertainment,  and the attendees, everything was perfect, my boyfriend and I  were so lucky to be a part of this event, thanks to Social Common.

Through Scrubs in the City, SickKids raised more than $450,000 in support of the SickKids Operating Suites Redevelopment Project.

SickKids performs more than 12,000 surgeries annually to some of the most critically ill children from around the world and we were delighted to be a part of this. 

Below are a few photos from the evening.

http://socialcommon.ca

http://www.sickkidsfoundation.com

The Fluffiest of Pancakes!

I try to make pancakes at least once a week. Owen loves them and I love anything carb-related.

This particular morning, Owen requested that the pancakes not be made with coconut oil or whole wheat, so I searched for "fluffy pancakes" on Google, and chose the picture I thought looked the most appealing. This photo took me to a blog you can find here http://bloggingmama.com/fluffy-homemade-pancakes-from-scratch/ which led me to the fluffy pancake recipe. Owen agreed that these were the BEST pancakes that I have ever made!  

If you decide to try the recipe, just top the pancakes with fruit, powdered sugar and a little syrup, and you've got yourself a real morning treat! :)

Hope you enjoy them as much as we did!

I often go to Toronto to visit my boyfriend and girlfriends alone, as regularly, Owen will spend the weekend with his father. This weekend, I was able to bring Owen with me to Toronto which made my weekend even more special. We had a great time!  This beautiful city has so much to offer—not only for adults but also, for little ones!

Friday, Owen had fun gaming at Playdium, an arcade-style fun place for kids in Missassauga. Saturday, we spent the day in The Beaches and visited my friend’s cafe,  the Mad Hus Café ( https://www.facebook.com/madhuscafe) It was so nice to catch up with friends over espresso, hot chocolate and banana bread! In the evening, we went to dinner theatre at Medieval Times.  There, Owen had the opportunity to cheer on the knights, eat with his fingers and meet the performers after the show. Sunday, we took a walk and had lunch at Hunters Landing.  The burgers, and Owen’s pizza, were delicious and a perfect way to end our weekend.

The previous weekend I was childless and my boyfriend and I had the chance to have a date night at BENT (http://www.bentrestaurant.com/#!home) My favourite part of the meal was the yellow tail hamachi finished along with the caviar and lobster vodka shooters. If you haven’t had the chance to go, I would highly recommend this place for a couple’s or girl’s night out!

Enjoy your week!  X0

TBT

Time to get up, the son is shining 


You know that feeling… The feeling you get when someone is staring at you while you sleep? I get that feeling almost every morning.  It doesn’t startle me but I am very aware of it. I open my eyes and there is Owen quietly staring with his blankie and a bear in hand. “Hi Mom!” he says. “Hi Owen.  Good morning”, I say. Then I look at my phone to see what time it is, and it’s 5am… Oh my it’s 5 am. “Time to get up!” says Owen.  Owen, my love it is only 5am, would you like to crawl into bed with me? Let’s sleep a little longer.”  Owen assures me it’s morning and tells me that the sun is out. “Look the sun is shining through your curtains” I peek behind the curtains… Honey, that is the street lamp, it’s 5am. I look over at Owen and he has a big smile across his face. He could care less that it is 5am; he doesn’t know what 5am means.  All he knows is that he’s up and he’s happy and he’s ready to play.  “Ok, I’ll get up”, I wink back.

We go downstairs.   I make myself a coffee and get Owen some milk.  I get down on the floor beside him as he plays with his toys and try to look as enthusiastic as he does while he tells me about robots and what they can do to buildings. We play a little longer, and then I make breakfast.  Then we build a fort in the living room, play with trains, and then it is just about time for us to get ready for school. I look at the clock and tell Owen that I will let him watch a show on TV while I run upstairs to get myself ready. I scoot upstairs to do my hair, make-up and throw on some clothes. I then head downstairs to get Owen dressed and ready for school, and what do I find?  He is fast asleep on the couch.  I smile, and let him sleep a little longer before getting him ready for school.

Slowly, I wake Owen.  Eyes blinking open, he greets me with, “Hi Mom”.  “Hi Owen,” I smile back. “Time to get up, the sun is shining”

Throw back Thursday-- One of my favourite posts

Days to Remember...

Owen was just about two when Sean and I went our separate ways. I was working at Language Instruction for Newcomers to Canada and made the decision to go back to school. That September, when school started for the both of us, it was the worst September of my life.

Every day was a struggle. Owen had a very hard time adjusting and so did I. Bracing for a good-bye, he would have his arms stretched up to me, crying.  Tears streaming down his face,  I would kiss him, hug him, and tell him I would be back as soon as Mommy was finished class.

As brave as all that was, I would leave home every morning in tears, having to fix my make up in the car before heading to class. I don’t know how I made it through that first year. It must have been the people around me, supporting me, and pushing me forward. I reminded myself that I was going back to school for the better good of myself and my son. I carried on.

A year has passed but Owen still has a tough time in the morning when I drop him off at daycare-- not all days are bad, but still, about 40% of the time it will be a challenge getting him out the door.  We may leave with a few tears, but he is always happy when I pick him up at the end of the day. I keep that in mind.

Yesterday was different, yesterday was a day I always want to remember. As I was getting Owen out of the car Owen shouted “Vanessa is going to be here!” “ Oh how nice! I said back to him. “Yesterday you two were playing ‘tag’ in the school yard, looked like you two were having a great time!” I said. “Yup!”, he said.  Then we walked inside. I took off his coat, hat, and mitts, and gave him a hug and kiss good bye. I could see Vanessa sitting at the table having her morning snack so I said good morning to her, too, and pointed Owen in her direction. Owen waved good bye to me and stood in front of the door with his blankie, like he always does. I stood there for awhile and I am so happy that I did.

 I watched Vanessa as she got up from her chair with her cereal bowl and she walked towards the kitchen to hand her bowl to the teacher. Then she came back towards Owen, bent her knees so that he would look into her eyes, and she smiled. Without saying a word she put out her hand to take his and they walked hand in hand towards the play area.

Tears filling into my eyes “that was so nice” I said out loud. I started walking towards the exit, waving goodbye to other teachers on my way out. And as I drove home, I thought about Vanessa and what a little angel she was. I thought back to this past fall when I would drop off Owen and he would cry, Vanessa would come up and give Owen a hug and I would hear the teacher say “give Owen some space” as I was leaving. Every single day this darling little Vanessa has been the first to come over to Owen and give him a hug, or wait patiently in front of him, standing still, until he is calm, and ready to play.

When I arrived back at daycare to pick up my little Owen, Owen ran up to me yelling ”Momm!!” I gave Owen a hug and a kiss, then I walked over to Vanessa and gave her a hug. What I wanted to say right there was “Thank you for looking after my son. You have no idea what it means to me to know that he has you to comfort him.” But instead, I said “Thank you for being such a great friend to Owen.” No words were returned, but a big smile on Vanessa’s face. That was all that I needed. I smiled back. J

Life is funny, isn't  it?

Tonight I came across a blog post that spoke to me, it was almost as though everything I have been thinking was neatly laid out for me, written  by someone else who had my thoughts placed in their mind. I could relate to this post in every way.

She wrote about how she hopes her readers realize that this blogging that we do, is edited. We keep a lot of our private life private – not everything needs to be shared.

 I am always boasting about how great my little Owen is because most of the stories that I write about are the fun/good times I share with him. I try not to hold on to the bad days, which I do write about as well, but they are a lot less frequent.

I love Owen more than life itself. He isn't perfect, and I am far from it, but I rave about how much I love him—because this life with him, is perfect to me, it is everything I could have wanted and more.

 When I started blogging, most of my stories were past experience and wonderful memories I have created with Owen, and luckily some of you were able to connect with me in some way through your own experiences that it made you feel good to know that someone else is going through the same thing, but as much as I do not blog about it, I go through the same ups and downs as most of you.

 I appreciate all of you , my readers, I feel lucky to have you following me on my life journey, if there is anything you would like me to post about, or advice, I am always wanting to listen to each of you so feel free to email me.

Lately Owen and I have been busy making Christmas inspired crafts and cookies and our house is slowly overloading with reindeer. 

Reindeer have seemed to be the most exciting for Owen besides the obvious jolly old man. 

This craft was so easy to make! What you do: Paint  your little ones hands for the antlers and you can create the face or if your little one is old enough to do it themselves that works too! 

Spending this quality time is the most important thing to me. I'm able to listen to Owen's stories without distraction, he has my full attention. His personality shines, his giggle fills my heart, he is sweet and I hope he remembers these times to be some of his favourite times with me too. 

Oh yes, that little finger that I’m wrapped around.

The same little finger that tells me “no, you’re wrong Mom” now that you’re in a junior kindergarten and  know everything about anything.

The same little finger that you used to point out new objects that you wanted to learn about when you were a baby.

The same little finger I give kisses to -

The same little finger that you use to finger paint - 

The same little finger you use to say “We’re number one!” Like you did here at the hockey game.

All things I want to remember.

You’re growing and changing a little bit each day. 

You’re learning and teaching me new things about being a parent to a now 4 year old.

You amaze me, you humble me, you test me, but most of all, you show me that I can love with every part of me.

You will always have me wrapped around your tiny little finger, always, and forever.

After you

One day after school last week, instead of going straight home, we took a drive through the country side. Weeks before I took this same drive because Owen had fallen asleep in the car, I kept driving…Trust me, he needed his sleep. ;)

While driving down the country side we drove past a red barn that I had never seen before, it looked as though it was a store or burger place? Barn, cow, burger place… made sense to me. The other day I thought it would be fun to take a drive to this barn to see what it was exactly, and what it was a cheese barn! They sell all sorts of cheese, even cheese curds—delicious!  Pepperettes, fresh fruit, and other staples.

Owen and I left with a root beer, cream soda, sticks of meat and fresh concord grapes.

As I buckled Owen into his car seat, root beer in hand, he said: “This was really fun mommy”.  It just goes to show you, it really is the little things that matter most.

When we arrived home, we sat on the front porch and talked about our day, and how beautifully warm the weather was. When we were about to head inside Owen put his arm out to stop me “Let me get it” as he started to open the door, “after you, Mom”.

Not only are you sweet, and kind Owen, you are a gentlemen.

I am the luckiest lady in the world.

Breast Feeding Matters

There is no question that breast milk contains everything that your baby needs for the first 6 months of their life. Breast milk contains nutrients and essential vitamins to promote healthy brain development and prevents risks of ear, chest and stomach infections, prevents diarrhea, Crohn's disease, colitis, SIDS and the risk of obesity later on in life.

Breast milk is always available, at the right temperature, and promotes healthy bonding between you and your baby.

Once your baby is born, the feedings will be frequent, and shorter in duration, ( this is where having their crib close to your bed comes in handy) as their little bodies mature and develop, and as their tummy's grow, their feedings will become less frequent and longer in duration. If you are worried that your baby isn't getting enough breast milk, here are some guidelines: To give you an idea your baby's stomach in only about the size of a cherry when they are born. Look for at least one wet diaper, and one soiled diaper the first day, on day two, at least 2 wet diapers, and by day 7, your baby should be having at least 6 wet diapers and 3 soiled diapers by this point. 

Having encouragement and support around you is also important. When I was pregnant, my mother would brag to me about how wonderful and easy breast feeding was for her, that she could feed, pump, have extra milk stored in the fridge. To me it all sounded so simple, and I remember thinking- breastfeeding will be a breeze! Boy, was I wrong! Owen was a sleepy baby and would fall asleep almost immediately, I was having a hard time latching, he preferred one breast to the other, it became frustrating, I was tired, and feeling down.

 Here is a valuable lesson that I learned through all of this, don't be afraid to ask for help. I contacted the local health unit, and had a visiting nurse come by the home to help me stimulate Owen, to keep him awake and interested. She showed me different breast feeding positions and surprisingly, the "football hold" (go figure), worked! A few days passed since the last visit with visiting the  nurse and even though I thought I had breastfeeding down to a science, I still involved myself in a close by breastfeeding group. Although Owen and I were on our way to breastfeeding successfully, it was still great to hear that other Mother's were going through the same trouble with breastfeeding like I was. It was good to feel like I was not the only one, it was a good way to meet other mothers, and learn some valuable tips. 

Breastfeeding and bonding with your baby is one of the most pleasurable aspects of motherhood and infant care. Enjoy it. :)

If you are interested in joining a breastfeeding group, La Leche League is a great resource to use, as they have mother to mother support groups and education, tips and tricks of breastfeeding. To find a group near you, you can visit their website at http://www.lllc.ca/

I remember looking at Owen when he first came into the world and thinking-- WOW you are the most beautiful baby I have ever laid eyes on, I love you, I would die for you. It is overwhelming, the love you can have for your baby.

I have had the joyous opportunity to have been at home with my son until he was about two years of age when he started daycare. Before daycare we had all the time in the world to enjoy every moment together. I was with him for his “firsts” smiling, eating, crawling, walking. I have been lucky, as I know not everyone has that luxury.

Here are some tips I would give to Mothers who are at home with their little ones: 

*Let go of the fact that your house may not be as spotless as you used to have it.

Before Owen came along, my cupboards were organized, the house was tidy. Owen was born, and at first it was a piece of cake, I would clean or cook while he was napping, it was a dream. Owen started crawling and soon his stuffed animals, blocks, balls, and books were everywhere and my house was torn upside down. Funny how someone so small can create such a huge mess! I found letting go of the feeling that I had to have  everything perfect helped. 

*Take time for your own shower, hair and makeup.

 I found we did not use the playpen much unless it was for this. I would set up the play pen in my room, put some toys in the play pen for Owen to play with and then quickly shower while talking to Owen through the curtain. It really did keep him occupied and, depending on how long he was amused by our chat and his toys,  I would be able to get my hair and make up done, too!

*Create a routine that works for you.

 This is not always easy, but if you have a good routine with your baby it will make your life and his/hers much easier. We would have our scheduled eating and nap times, dinner, bath and bedtime. At bedtime I would cuddle him and read with him, even when he was teeny tiny. We’ve always enjoyed that time together and having a routine made sure it happened.

*Let them get messy.

When Owen first started solids, I would have a spoon to feed Owen, and Owen would have a spoon to feed himself. Food would get in his hair, all over his face, clothes…. I, along with Owen, thought it was fun. If your baby gets a little messy, that’s what baths are for! I also found with Owen that, if he ate, then bathed, he would nap very well.  This rule also applies to when your little one starts discovering mud, puddles, grass, and the outdoors in general. Discovery is a way of learning- Let them enjoy it and you will too!

             *Fussy baby- Go for a walk!

I found this was a good for both of us. It got us out of the house, and into the fresh air! We would walk around the block and pop down to the park that is around the corner from us. This is also a great way to meet some other mothers in your area. One of my neighbors and I set out a time every other day to meet and walk with our little ones.  It was nice to have that adult interaction too.  You can only talk baby-talk so long…J

*Play dates

Organize play dates with other mothers and take turns as to where you have the play date. Put on some appetizers, take out some cookies and put on a pot of coffee. This is a great social time for you and the little ones.

Get a good sense of what is available to you for fun for you and your little one.  In London, there are lots of things for parents to do with their tots.  Here are some great options for you and yours:

-The Stoney Creek YMCA- great for learning to swim, they have Mommy and Tot programs and Owen has always enjoyed going to the Jungle Gym. http://ymcawo.ca/stoney-creek

-Chapters-I love to grab a coffee and watch Owen play with the other children. They have a fun, little kids area and we always end up leaving with a new book. www.chapters.indigo.ca

-The Public Library- Kids can borrow books, and their calendar shows a story time every week. http://www.londonpubliclibrary.ca/kids/programs

-The Little Gym- Great for a variety of ages and a ton of fun! www.thelittlegym.com/LondonON

- Adventure on Wonderland- Inexpensive fun! They have two play areas one for toddlers and the other for the older children. www.adventuresonwonderland.ca

-London Children’s museum- Owen and I will go here a few times a year. He absolutely loves this Museum!  I even find it hard to leave!  www.londonchildrensmuseum.ca

-Storybook Garden- Rides, games, treats, animal farm and a water park—there are lots of fun and educational things to do.  Make sure you pack extra clothes! J www.storybook.london.ca

Let’s talk about sex, shall we?

During pregnancy you may find that this is the most aroused you have ever been in your relationship. Your hormones are accelerating, your estrogen levels are high, blood is flowing to your pelvic area, you have that beautiful pregnancy glow, your breasts are large and sensitive, and your body has gorgeous curves. You may feel this way all the way up until you deliver, and unless otherwise advised by your doctor, sex during pregnancy can be a new, liberating and exciting thing for both you, and your partner. Although some positions may no longer work with your beautiful belly, this is the time to try out new positions, get creative, and explore this new experience.

Here are some tips and the best sex positions during pregnancy, according to Fitpregnancy.com

 

Let’s Talk About (Pregnant) Sex

If fears about ‘doing it’ are stressing you out, here’s what you need to know.

Sex can still be comfortable
The old standby missionary position for intercourse may not work for you now. Instead, try these options:

Spooning: Lie side by side with him behind you. This makes for more shallow penetration.

You on top: There’s no pressure on your belly, and you can control the speed and depth of penetration.

Side of the bed: You lie on your back on the edge of the bed with your knees bent and feet on the edge. He stands facing you. It’s like classic missionary, but he won’t be resting his body weight on you.

Living room love: Kneel on a couch with your belly facing the back of it; use your arms for support. He penetrates from behind.

You will have sex again after the baby comes
Just be aware that with the sudden drop of estrogen after delivery, your libido can plummet and the lining of your vagina thins out, making intercourse feel like you’re losing your virginity all over again. This can be particularly true if you’re breastfeeding.

Most docs recommend that you wait six weeks until after giving birth (even for oral sex). The goals are to allow your body to heal, avoid infection and deal with any psychological or emotional issues you and your partner may be feeling. When you do venture back, it’s important to make your partner aware that you may need plenty of foreplay (and possibly lubrication). Taking care of the baby for you whenever possible so that you can nap couldn’t hurt, either!

Time to get up, the son is shining

You know that feeling… The feeling you get when someone is staring at you while you sleep? I get that feeling almost every morning.  It doesn’t startle me but I am very aware of it. I open my eyes and there is Owen quietly staring with his blankie and a bear in hand. “Hi Mom!” he says. “Hi Owen.  Good morning”, I say. Then I look at my phone to see what time it is, and it’s 5am… Oh my it’s 5 am. “Time to get up!” says Owen.  Owen, my love it is only 5am, would you like to crawl into bed with me? Let’s sleep a little longer.”  Owen assures me it’s morning and tells me that the sun is out. “Look the sun is shining through your curtains” I peek behind the curtains… Honey, that is the street lamp, it’s 5am. I look over at Owen and he has a big smile across his face. He could care less that it is 5am; he doesn’t know what 5am means.  All he knows is that he’s up and he’s happy and he’s ready to play.  “Ok, I’ll get up”, I wink back.

We go downstairs.   I make myself a coffee and get Owen some milk.  I get down on the floor beside him as he plays with his toys and try to look as enthusiastic as he does while he tells me about robots and what they can do to buildings. We play a little longer, and then I make breakfast.  Then we build a fort in the living room, play with trains, and then it is just about time for us to get ready for school. I look at the clock and tell Owen that I will let him watch a show on TV while I run upstairs to get myself ready. I scoot upstairs to do my hair, make-up and throw on some clothes. I then head downstairs to get Owen dressed and ready for school, and what do I find?  He is fast asleep on the couch.  I smile, and let him sleep a little longer before getting him ready for school.

Slowly, I wake Owen.  Eyes blinking open, he greets me with, “Hi Mom”.  “Hi Owen,” I smile back. “Time to get up, the sun is shining”

Do you know how much I love you? You may not know now, but you will one day.

One day far from now, when you have your own children. 

When you start learning what it is to be a parent, what it is to love wholeheartedly. 

When you realize what you've learned from your parents, and why we were so patient with you, you will find patience. You will realize how much I love you because I've always promised to show you my unconditional love, every single day, for the rest of your life. 

Every day you will feel this love, even when I'm not with you, you will feel it in your heart.

You will feel how much I love you when you see your child smile, when they hug you, when they tell you how much they love you, when you feel that feeling of going to the end of the world for your child, if only that would make them happy. You will do anything for their happiness, then you will know how much I love you, one day far, far from now.

My Gypsy Heart

Before Owen was born, my soul was a gypsy wandering.  I was always trying something new, travelling,  never wanting to sit still. Now, my life could not be more opposite, and although I wouldn’t have it any other way, now and again my little gypsy heart urges me to try something different, something new.

Now that I’m finished my studies, I will be working next week. My plan is to save up and take myself on a trip. I want to get lost in a new place. I won’t be gone for long, mind you- I can barely resist being away from Owen for a night, but a four-day trip somewhere, sounds idyllic.

Knowing myself, I will probably be checking my phone every few hours to see how Owen is doing, and will be watching videos of him saved on my phone, but I will keep in mind my belief, that it is important not to forget the person you were before your children came into your life. Take some time for yourself, do the things/activities you used to do before your children came along. Try something new, read a book, take a day or four away to yourself. After all, most of those life experiences made you the person you are today.

You may even find you are a better Mother/Father for taking that time. As much as it is easy to do, do not loose YOU.

Take care.

X0